MARCH 21ST: THE BEDINGFIELDS
Updated: 13:14, Monday March 24, 2008
Society gets the celebrities it deserves, the saying goes. In my mind, this conjures up images of Satan himself, deep in the bowels of hell, collating our collective sins, brewing them up in a big, steaming cauldron and sending the results up to Earth in the form of GMTV's Fiona Phillips or Howard from the Halifax ads, say.
I'm sure we can all think of naughty deeds we may have committed to deserve being inflicted by such gonks - perhaps you wrap pieces of bread around popping candy and feed it to pigeons; or maybe you tell small children that any part of their body hanging out of their duvet at night will be feasted upon by the drooling, red-eyed beast under the bed who will suck the flesh from their very bones - we all have our guilty secrets.
But, man alive, what heinous crime was committed to warrant the Bedingfields?!
For one, shining moment there it looked as though they had disappeared forever. Sure, when Same Difference appeared on the scene, there were nervous whispers that someone had spilt some water on 'Tash and Dan or perhaps fed them after midnight, causing little clones-gone-wrong to pop out of their backs like hairy ping-pong balls. Still, when it became obvious that nothing more than ritual, weekly humiliation and a public vote was enough to rid the world of SD's disturbing, bordering on incestuous, pop-parp, any suspicions regarding their supernatural origins were allayed.
But now, a video showing the siblings touting themselves for charidee has confirmed the worst - the big-gobbed bint and beat-boxing buffoon are back. Worse, they're singing. Together. Not on a stage with music and backing vocals, etc, no, they're slipping the odd warble into their conversation as they tell us all what 'amazing' goodies they're selling on eBay to raise money for Global Angels. Like a dress Natasha wore to meet Prince William. Or a private singing lesson with Daniel.
Eugh, a little bit of sick came up then...
Anyway, all I've got to say on the matter is, if they're so into their charity-gigs why don't they offer something people would really pay good money for.....like their voice boxes on a keyring.....or just seeing them generally naffing-off.....ahhhh, dreams, dreams.......
I'm sure we can all think of naughty deeds we may have committed to deserve being inflicted by such gonks - perhaps you wrap pieces of bread around popping candy and feed it to pigeons; or maybe you tell small children that any part of their body hanging out of their duvet at night will be feasted upon by the drooling, red-eyed beast under the bed who will suck the flesh from their very bones - we all have our guilty secrets.
But, man alive, what heinous crime was committed to warrant the Bedingfields?!
For one, shining moment there it looked as though they had disappeared forever. Sure, when Same Difference appeared on the scene, there were nervous whispers that someone had spilt some water on 'Tash and Dan or perhaps fed them after midnight, causing little clones-gone-wrong to pop out of their backs like hairy ping-pong balls. Still, when it became obvious that nothing more than ritual, weekly humiliation and a public vote was enough to rid the world of SD's disturbing, bordering on incestuous, pop-parp, any suspicions regarding their supernatural origins were allayed.
But now, a video showing the siblings touting themselves for charidee has confirmed the worst - the big-gobbed bint and beat-boxing buffoon are back. Worse, they're singing. Together. Not on a stage with music and backing vocals, etc, no, they're slipping the odd warble into their conversation as they tell us all what 'amazing' goodies they're selling on eBay to raise money for Global Angels. Like a dress Natasha wore to meet Prince William. Or a private singing lesson with Daniel.
Eugh, a little bit of sick came up then...
Anyway, all I've got to say on the matter is, if they're so into their charity-gigs why don't they offer something people would really pay good money for.....like their voice boxes on a keyring.....or just seeing them generally naffing-off.....ahhhh, dreams, dreams.......
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